When it comes to marriage, there’s one thing that all experts agree on: making time for yourself is absolutely essential. Sure, marriage can be a beautiful thing, but if you’re not taking care of yourself and putting your needs first, it’s easy to get caught up in the daily responsibilities and forget what’s really important. That’s why I’m here today to share my top tips for carving out time for yourself in a busy marriage.
Firstly, let’s start with defining marriage. According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, marriage is “the state of being united as spouses in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law”. Essentially, marriages are about two people committing themselves to share their lives together, supporting each other in every way possible.
But despite trying to put each other first, it’s still important to make time for yourselves separately. Taking the opportunity to do something you love, or taking some ‘you’ time, won’t just make sure that both you and your partner stay healthy and happy — it can also help prevent your marriage from going stale. So, without further ado, read on to discover my strategies for making time for yourself in the midst of a successful marriage.
Identify Your Needs
As much as marriage is about loving each other and enjoying each other’s company, it’s also about taking care of yourself. After all, you can’t give what you don’t have! It’s important to take an honest look at your needs, and figure out how you can take care of them in the midst of being married.First of all, assess what you need. Are you feeling physically exhausted? Mentally overstimulated? Do you need time to yourself- time to relax and unwind, or do something creative? Ask yourself these questions and more, be honest with yourself and answer them without shame or judgement.Once you’ve identified what you need, make a list of your priorities – break it down into a weekly, manageable checklist. Maybe this week you want to spend a few hours curled up reading, take a walk outside, or sign up for a yoga class. Whatever it is, put it on the list and make sure you hold yourself accountable to taking that time for yourself. Once it’s on paper and in your hands, it’s easier to commit to making it happen.
Understand Your Spouse
When it comes to making time for yourself, one of the most important things you can do is make sure you understand your spouse. Take a moment to consider how you both can commit to setting aside time for each other.
It’s not always easy but having open communication and spelling out what’s important to you—and making sure your partner knows your boundaries—is key.
For example, if you need to take some time for yourself once in a while, make sure that’s clear up front. If your partner is understanding and willing to cooperate, even better!
But, don’t just leave it at that. Show your appreciation by reassuring your spouse that connecting with friends, or just stepping away from the relationship for some private time, is just as important to you too.
Take this opportunity to talk about things like date nights and possibly even setting time aside for family outings. That way, you’ll get the quality time with your spouse and have extra time for yourself later.
Establish A Schedule
If you want to make sure that you and your spouse take enough time for yourselves, it’s essential to set up a weekly schedule. To keep balanced, both of you should agree on a plan that allows for each of you to have some personal time, but also some quality time together. Think about your collective needs and priorities, like errands, family activities, hobbies, or work commitments, and plan accordingly.
For some couples, this might mean carving out an hour during the week to spend alone, while others might plan an afternoon in the park with the kids. Whatever works best for your relationship, make sure it’s something that you can stick to! It’s also important to give each other space when needed, especially if one of you has a higher-pressure job or extra commitments.
This doesn’t mean that the two of you can’t ever spontaneously jump in the car and drive to the beach – it just means taking the time to be thoughtful and intentional about how you spend your time together. Doing this will help add a level of stability and balance to your life as a couple.
Take Breaks (And Not Just For Others)
Listen up, folks: it’s time to start taking breaks for yourselves. It’s easy to get lost in the day-to-day grind of making sure everyone else is taken care of, but you need to remember that you matter too. Taking a few minutes here and there to recharge is essential if you want to stay healthy and happy.
Self-care is so important, and it looks different for everyone. Maybe you like taking baths or reading books; maybe you enjoy going for walks or spending time with friends. Whatever it is that helps you unwind–make sure you find time for it whenever you can.
It’s also good to get out in nature. Whether that means hiking up a mountain or just taking a stroll around your local park, there’s something invigorating about fresh air and sunshine. Don’t let time at home hold you back from feeling alive and energized.
And finally, don’t forget to make time for your friends. Reassuring your partner that connecting with friends is still important will help your relationship stay strong, not to mention it’ll be good for your mental health. Plan regular nights out with your mates and keep up with your pals–you’ll thank yourself later.
Connect With Friends
I’m no stranger to how hard it can be to balance a marriage with making time for yourself. But the truth is, taking care of yourself is as important as tending to your relationship. That’s why it’s so crucial to make sure you stay connected with friends — for your wellbeing and for the success of your union.
If you want it to work, tell your partner that connecting with friends is essential for you both. It helps to have an understanding of each other’s needs. Then, the two of you should map out a plan to make it happen.
Of course, actually doing it is a whole different story. You’re gonna have to be proactive here — not just talking the talk, but walking the walk, too. Create a schedule, if need be, and stick to it! Don’t be surprised if it takes time to get settled in this new routine; Rome wasn’t built in a day, ya know? But it will be worth it in the end, I assure you.
Now sure, there are those rare occasions when something comes up and you don’t manage to meet up with a friend or make it to an event. And that’s okay. Just make sure to take a break every now and then to recharge your batteries — whether that means engaging in self-care practices, chilling outdoors, or anything else that brings you peace.
Spending some quality time with friends is part of staying healthy and happy. And happily married couples know: A marriage made in heaven requires effort, understanding, and communication. Plus, who doesn’t love a little company every once in a while? So don’t forget: Make time for yourself and with friends. Your marriage will thank you!
Bringing it All Together: Separate Time for Yourself is Essential for Marital Bliss
When it comes to being in a healthy relationship, it’s important to make sure you’re taking care of yourself, too. It can be difficult to balance marriage and “me” time – but with the right planning and priorities in place, it doesn’t have to be! The key is to understand each other’s needs, get on the same page about what daily “me” time should look like, set boundaries, establish a weekly schedule, take breaks, and continue to connect with friends. You don’t have to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of your marriage – it’s possible to find joy as an individual, while still strengthening your partnership.
Marriage is certainly a beautiful thing – and one of the most important things you can do is to remember to make time for just you. Whether it’s committing to a yoga class every week or scheduling a standing monthly brunch date with your besties, separate time is essential for marital bliss. With the above tips in mind, you can find that much-needed balance between partnership and personal time.
FAQs on Self-Care in Marriage
How much alone time is normal in a marriage?
It may seem like a difficult task to make time for yourself in marriage, but it is an essential part of having a successful and healthy relationship. Everyone needs time apart to do their own thing, recharge and reconnect with their own needs and interests. But it can be hard to figure out how much alone time is normal in a marriage.
First of all, it’s important to recognize that alone time is a normal and healthy part of any relationship. It’s also important to understand that needs for space and time apart may vary from person to person and from couple to couple. There is no one size fits all answer when it comes to how much alone time is normal in a marriage.
For some couples, the answer may be an hour a day or an evening a week spent apart. For other couples, it may mean taking a full weekend away periodically. And for some couples, it may even mean living apart a portion of the time. All of these scenarios can be perfectly healthy and normal.
The key is to first discuss your individual needs and expectations as a couple and come to an agreement that works for both of you. Once you have an understanding of what is acceptable, it is important to make a commitment to putting time for yourself in the marriage. Schedule it into the calendar and make it a priority. Whether it’s reading a book, going for a morning walk or planning a weekend away, make sure to prioritize time for yourself and your relationship.
Making time for yourself in marriage may take some effort, but it’s worth it. Doing so can help keep your relationship strong, healthy and happy. So take the time to make sure you’re both getting enough chances to recharge and grow as individuals.
What is the hardest time in a marriage?
The hardest time in a marriage is when both spouses struggle to make time for themselves. Couples have busy lives and are often juggling work and family responsibilities. While it is important to spend time together, it is also important to keep a healthy relationship. The best way to make time for yourself in marriage is to make sure that each partner has their own separate interests.
If one partner has a passion for gardening and the other for reading, then it is important to make sure that both are able to do the activity they love. This will help keep both partners’ interests alive in the marriage. Similarly, each spouse should make time for their own hobbies, such as running, fishing, or biking. This is both good for the individual, and for the relationship as it gives each spouse a chance to further develop their personal interests.
Additionally, couples should make sure that they are scheduling quality time together. This could be a weekly date night, a weekend getaway, or even just sitting down together with a cup of coffee. It is important to set up time when both spouses can focus on each other and not on responsibilities and obligations.
Finally, if couples are able to find balance in their marriage and make time for themselves, it will lead to a stronger relationship. It is important to remember that each partner is an individual and needs to pursue hobbies and interests that make them happy. By making sure that each partner is able to make time for their own interests and for the relationship, couples will be able to grow together in an atmosphere of mutual respect and understanding.